Homesickness at University: Jasmin’s story

University is daunting. Moving away from home is daunting. Both combined? Terrifying! (At least for some… me included).

I felt stressed and scared about how I would cope moving three hours away from home.

Don’t get me wrong, I can look after myself – I can cook, clean and wash my own clothes – but having to enter the world in which you can’t just shout for your mum to help if you’ve done something wrong felt like a whole new level of worry.  

Those first few hours of my parents leaving me in my university accommodation with five people I did not know made me feel as though I was an alien on earth… absolutely out of my depth. Spoiler alert: we all felt this way! Yes, some on a deeper level than others but at one point in time, we all experienced homesickness. It is completely normal.

Of course it makes you feel like you’re the only one experiencing this but trust me when I say this… everyone in that moment felt strange or worried, whether it was homesickness or just anxious about starting something new; everyone felt something similar to me on the day we arrived/entered/started university.  

Honestly, you learn to live with it. As time progresses, trust me, you’ll be grateful to only return to your parents’ house at the end of term. It becomes a treat, a break away from uni assignments, but also allows you to escape and reclaim ‘adulthood’ and the choices of taking showers at midnight because why not? Or go out clubbing until the crack of dawn and not stress that you might get an earful from your parents the next day for waking them up when creeping up the stairs.  

It is easy to think that moving away from home is a huge risk but actually it helps to build confidence, self-esteem and your ability to understand why your parents hate doing the washing up after a big meal.

It might allow you the opportunity to take the initial step of moving out without the commitment. (if you’re lucky enough to be able to move back home if needed).

It allows you the ability to understand what needs to be considered when renting or buying the “real” thing.

It lets you understand the commitments of looking after yourself and getting to the point where you think, yes I am ready and no I cannot live another day with my parents nagging me about how my room looks or why I am not awake at 8am naturally! It is a privilege, a safety net of sorts, allowing you to make friends, make memories but also understand that you are ready to take that next step into adulthood and begin your journey of leaving your childhood bedroom behind.  

Moving away from home is an experience for many at university, some with more miles in-between them and their families than others. You are not alone in feeling uncomfortable and you are not silly for missing your family, including those who might have only moved 30 minutes away and still pop home at the weekends! We are all human, we are all entitled to feel emotions about moving away, regardless of what your situation is at home.

Missing loved ones, whether it be your family, school friends, or pets, is completely natural.  

Cry those tears, feel those feelings and remember that it’s okay to give them a call, FaceTime or drive home to see them if you wish. It’s also important to say that not everyone will feel sadness about moving away from home and that’s okay – everyone reacts to things differently and has a different relationship with home and family life. For those of you who don’t get homesick, it’s okay to be out and enjoying your life!